Paradise on Earth, 112, Free bibles and free meditation

"It only takes three storytellers to be called a fact of history."

Paradise on Earth, 111, New energy sources

Interestingly, there's another eccentric Lincolnite who is convinced that perpetual motion/energy machines exist and are being hidden from the public. I wonder if they know one another?

Paradise on Earth, 106, Park and bike ride

Loving bikes and hating liberals...

Paradise on Earth, 95, Electric poles and lamp posts

This one mostly summarizes her main points from recent flyers. I'm super glad to see that "solar musical hats" made the cut! But I guess she won't have them mass-produced in China...

Paradise on Earth, 92, Sprinkling of trees

CHICKEN IN A BASKET!

Having recently been part of an urban chicken experiment, let me just say that our poultry friends aren't so idyllic as CBPL suggest. Mostly they poop all day long, and generally destroy whatever area they're in. Like baskets, for example.

Paradise on Earth, 91, Nursing home improvements

It seems like CBPL hasn't actually been to a nursing home/care facility in a while. Haven't most of them offered the (sane) stuff she lists here for quite some time?

Paradise on Earth, 90, For arthritis or inflamed bursa sac...

I love how we only need 2 people working at the patent office, and they'll be able to turn around thousands of requests, cross-checking against millions of previous requests, in like 3 months. So simple.

Paradise on Earth, 89, Laws are to protect the innocent

This one's focus on legal/civil procedures makes a nice companion to her recent economic theory flyer...

Paradise on Earth, 88, Proove subliminals are on TV

State "DIVINE I WET SUBLIMINALS." Brown, long, thin subliminals. And put food on your neighbors' faces to wake them.

I'm going to be the most popular guy on my block once I integrate these ideas into my routine!

Paradise on Earth, 87, Free China

Wet the subliminals.

Paradise on Earth, 86, Fuzzy sternum

For me, these flyers take on a noticeably weirder/more paranoid vibe starting around this one. There's some Grade-A crazy in here. We've upgraded the "build a wall on the West Coast" concept, for example, to include land mines. But don't worry--they're a "peaceful" measure to take if you just put up signs.

My favorite section, though, is the "brown thin long needle subliminals" routine. Totally wild.

Paradise on Earth, 85, 14 reasons for no dumb drugs

I wonder what happened in CBPL's past that gives her such a truly strange perspective on "dating" and male/female relationships in general? I seem to remember Norway being mentioned as a "revisionist history" lesson before, but here we even get a setting: It was 1980. You're with a blonde at the bar...

Paradise on Earth, 84, Nice answers for college students

Here's one for you UNL kiddies...pairing and sharing! Dances and Digits! Architecture Boot Camp!

Paradise on Earth, 83, Evaluate an economy for kindness

This one intrigues me in its sudden and fairly thorough deviation into (oversimplified) economic theory...

Paradise on Earth, 81, Who's fault is it?

In a bold move that perhaps heralds an Even Newer Testament era, the 10 commandments have been increased to 14, and the original 10 have undergone their first edits in a millenieum!

Paradise on Earth, 78, Necessity is the mother of invention

I've been sitting on a big stack of these flyers--I guess it's time to start posting 'em again.


The most interesting notion in this flyer for me, though, is the solar hat that converts energy into music. If she works that one out, I'll take two!